i can’t believe i have to fucking say it because i’m an educator so like how is it possible nobody else has said this.
unless a person is actively making materials/etc for children, they do not need to worry about your kid.
your child gets respect as a human. that’s it. nobody’s private life/artistic endeavors/unrelated interests must be controlled for the sake of your kid.
educators and athletes and artists do not have to live in chastity because your kid might see us on our days off. we do not owe it to your kid to only write poems about bunnies and only sing songs about tying your shoes. i do not care how much a person has given to children, if they are acting as an adult in adult spheres, they are allowed to. they are adults. it is your job as a caregiver to raise your kid and keep them out of adult spheres, not our job to keep ourselves out of those spheres just in case.
guess what! adult role models are going to bars and hooking up and dancing and being adults! this is so they have the mental energy to do all the child-centric things.
“it makes me feel weird to picture them like that!” i don’t know how to tell you this but actors aren’t actually their roles. the customer-service personality your waitress has is probably not her actual personality. the way teachers interact with students is not the way that they interact with their private lives, and it shouldn’t be.
“this tells kids this kind of behavior is okay!” actually it’s showing kids a normal and natural progression of a person’s life, boundaries, and bodily autonomy. it’s showing kids that adults are dynamic human beings. kids already know this. they know there’s places they’re not allowed and things they don’t understand yet. it’s just that you have icky feelings because you were raised in a society with black-and-white morality.
celebrities don’t owe your children perfection, modesty, sobriety. and you know something? it’s way healthier when they don’t. “this is a person, who gets up every morning and does their job - but also has adult interests, which you’ll learn about later” is way healthier as a role model than “you should be perfect like the curated image of this person and if you’re not perfect you should be deeply ashamed.”
anyway. idk why “think of the children!!!!” is making a comeback as a popular stance. but to be clear? it’s a way of saying “this makes me feel uncomfortable, but i don’t know why, and i don’t feel like untangling it, so i’ll blame you for it and hope you feel guilty about my children.”
hi, op here. do not make this about “fandom drama.” don’t do it.
it is about the policing of black bodies, of minority communities, of queer expression, and of women in the workforce.
it is about real people in the real world. the notes are full of people who express the same thing: teachers who cannot buy wine with their dinner, social workers who have to cover up perfectly appropriate tattoos, queer folk who worry about bringing up their partner in the workplace.
there are real-life, horrific, and ongoing consequences for this. real people get fired because they were in a picture holding a single beer, or they were seen wearing a too-saucy costume at halloween, or they kissed their partner in public on their day off. women have been fired for being the victim of revenge porn; their illegally distributed image instead just being seen as evidence against their character. there are queer artists that are actively being silenced because of this rhetoric. trans people fear using the fucking bathroom because of this rhetoric.this is about the return of white nationalist slogans to a public stage. this is about how we are even seriously debating the phrase “think of the children”. the children are not thought of during discussions of climate change, gun control, educational spending, free health care, student debt, access to childcare, access to food, or just getting the fucking vaccine and wearing a mask.
they do not care about the children. they want to protect their own bigotry by manipulating your empathy towards kids. that’s what this post is about.
please acknowledge the systemic, ongoing process of erasing identity and freedom. it is not just some “internet discussion”. it is a legitimate, scary, and powerful force that is hugely detrimental to the lives of those around you.
(via seananmcguire)
